Matter Of Time

Hey, what's up?

I hope all is well with you.

As I've matured, I've learned the importance of honoring and appreciating the relationships we hold dear in our lives. If we understood how finite these relationships were, would we value them differently? 

I learned after my second heartbreak that all relationships have a life expectancy. This insight has added exponential value to the quality of my relations. It has changed the way I engage in relationships, from platonic to romantic and even familial ones. It allows me to engage as much or as little as I want very conscientiously and deliberately.

This week's song speaks to this truth from a romantic perspective. It's the story of the period in my life when I decided I was never going to be in a long-term relationship again. I fancied myself an international playboy, an equal opportunity lover. I was very aware that I was hurt and scared to be that vulnerable again. But I wore my pain like a badge of honor. I told myself that I only wanted casual yet meaningful encounters with women, whatever that meant. I took solace in the fact that I was brutally honest about my position offering my love/lust interests the opportunity to agree or not.

The woman in this song represents many of the women I met and engaged with. She initially agrees to a casually meaningful encounter but quickly starts falling in love and decides the causal thing is not meaningful enough for her. Naturally, that was my cue to exit the situation-ship. For me it just meant our relationship had run its course.

It is said that "every person you meet in this world has something to teach you." The only way to receive it is to be open to it by fully engaging in the relationship, no matter how brief. I learned a lot in that period of my life. Is that something I'll do again, no! To be honest it was taxing and very stressful. I hadn't healed from my pain and didn't realize I was carrying it around, hurting others.

I've since changed my perspective on relationships. Meaningful ones require vulnerability and risk. It's in this space that the magic of relationships bloom. However, that doesn't mean it's all going to be rosy. Even the pain we experience teaches us if we're paying attention. The pain and pleasure will go away, but the lessons will stay. It's just a Matter Of Time.

Enjoy!

Logan.